What Rituals Remain?

It did not exceed any other year, as reported by the analog clocks keeping score in rhythmic clicks or the snow geese who migrated in great arrows that spring. Yet, this year held a magical sense of slowness. It scraped across the calendar with a weight tied to its ankle. A world — moving at never before speeds — was forced to a standstill.

Young adults were hit in a way specific to their age: trapped in a dead end of what would have been a monumental year for emotional and mental development.

“I think time definitely was moving pretty fast,” says Gigi Parente, the media manager for Lightforce Orthodontics who moved to Boston just a week before the lockdown. “Days were all blending together and the weekends didn’t really stand out anymore because we are still staying at home and being with our family, the same as it would be during the week.”

During the pandemic we moved into a sedentary lifestyle, one that forced us to sacrifice our mundane but valued rituals. The daily trip to the cafe before work, the weekly dinner with friends. Our immediate bubble shrank to just our homes. Now, as we move back to normal in an uncertain world, our bubbles have grown, but at a cautious pace. Parente felt her rituals being disrupted. “I would go to soul cycle classes like four times a week before the pandemic, and now I don’t see myself ever going back or going to any workout classes indoors like that anymore.”

The pandemic has also affected the anxiety levels of younger generations. Megan Ferronetti, The volunteering program coordinator at St. Ambrose Family Shelter in Dorchester has been struck by the change. “Pre-pandemic, the kids would hang out and play together. I think not being able to interact with the other children definitely had an impact on their social skills.” Ferronetti has seen anxiety about returning to activities that were routine pre-pandemic, like attending school. “We had one child at the shelter and she was incredibly nervous to go back to school, just being around children again and then getting used to that in person learning,” she states.

Alongside the anxiety and isolation came some surprising benefits. Ferronetti found that with the new restrictions the St. Ambrose Shelter had to adapt by becoming even more efficient.

The promise of working from home also came with some exciting freedoms. Many people now had extra time saved by not commuting, which could be used for personal projects and relaxation, even extra time spent with family. With every new struggle came a new opportunity. The silver lining was the rare chance to take a pause. Parente states, “The pandemic really offered us all an opportunity to kind of do some soul searching, you could say.”

Rituals may be disrupted but we also have the power to adapt. We cannot know the long term effects of this event on our collective mental health, but some people have found strength in the new constraints. “I feel a lot more independent and comfortable with being alone,”explains Parente. “I just like being by myself.”